Jan 20four

& here we are in Hermit Crab Mode

It’s been a few months now of pulling away from society (again) full time. Aka my version of hermit mode and choosing to be a homebody. Now I’ve been through this cycle before, but this round felt light and fluffy. Like a jiggly Japanese pancake. I have to note that it was surely different from my past versions of hermit mode. My cycles of HM before this round were a bit dark, and very victim mindset, and just completely unaware (I want to say there’s been maybe 1 or 2 rounds I’ve been aware of in the past 4 years…I’m not too sure). When I would be in HM in the past, I wouldn’t understand how I ended up there. I would “wake up” in HM and I would ask myself “wait a minute, why am I in self-isolation right now?”. Things were so confusing to me in the past, but only because I made it out to be. I used to pull away because I simply didn’t understand who I was. SELF SELF SELF.

Hint: It always comes back to self.

So what was different this cycle?

I definitely chose to take space this round. I don’t truly want to go into detail on what was different this cycle, but here is a bullet point version because I think it’s worth mentioning:

  • Patterns & Old Habits

  • Projecting

  • Triggers and Catching New Triggers

  • Nurturing those NEW Triggers

  • But also Nurturing those OLD triggers to calm my ass down

  • Nervous System

  • Protecting my E N E R G Y

  • I am focused.

The energy is so juicy and unreal to me right now.

I want to remember that I chose this life and that I absolutely LOVE what I am doing. Creating and story telling is so much fun. Documenting has been very humbling. I feel like I’m learning & understanding how to balance all the beauty in my life, and I’m very grateful to be aware of my energy & surroundings.

It’s a daily practice for me to stay healthy mentally, but it’s work that I will never get tired of doing. I’m honored to continue working on myself til infinity and beyond.

Thanks to the friends who assist me along this journey, I’m eternally grateful to you all.

Let’s get it February!!!

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